Monday, February 20, 2006

And that's the sound of my heart breaking all over again...

As we speak, I am currently in the midst of texting the Ex-Fucker.

Yes, yes, I know. Dangerous territory. But there is no one here; everyone is off doing stuff and did not reply to my 'Help!' texts, so I kinda got sucked in. Willpower is so not my forte.

It's just basic stuff, 'Hi; How are you?; What have you been up to?' but already my heart is racing at a million miles an hour, and I just know that I will not be able to sleep properly tonight.

Looks as though my 'NYE Freezer' trick didn't work after all.

For the uniniated, I read somewhere long ago that if you write a person's name down on a piece of paper, and place it in your freezer, then it 'symbolises freezing a person out of your life'. Neat trick, huh?

Anyway, I'm not really a superstitious person, but I really want(ed?) to have a hassle free 2006, and try and move on from the hurt and pain I went through with the Ex-Fucker last year.

So on NYE, I wrote the Ex-Fucker's name down, gave a short little speech in my kitchen, which was more of a 'letter' to him, and placed it in the very back of my freezer, with indifferent expectations.

And for the first month and a half of the year, it was working. I had not heard anything from him since NYE, and then a couple of days after, when he text me asking how my NYE was. I did not reply. God, GIVE ME THE WILLPOWER I HAD BACK THEN.

(Update: He just asked me "Are you still living by yourself?")

Anyway, the last couple of weeks, people started asking me (most people around me know of the drama) had I heard from him. I was very pleased (but on the inside, kinda sad) to say that I had not, and that this was going to be a good year, rah rah rah.

Until now. Fucker had to go and mess up my day month year life again by texting me. I should know better; the only way to heal such a broken, broken heart is to let sleeping dogs lie, but I just can't help myself. I am a bad, bad Martie. No smack required.

Anyway, I know most of you have probably been there and done that before - please regale me with your tales of woe, so I can feel a teensie, tiny bit better about the whole deal, please. Also, if you have any superstitions you think might help, don't be shy.

7 comments:

Enny said...

Did you put it in water before you freezed it? That might help...

But something else that helped me cure myself of every so often just chatting to an ex (ie the one before the one before The Hun that was almost 4 years worth, and in now way based on getting back together/hooking up/etc) was when I told him that my dog died (he liked the dog) and he replied: "OMG!!! Dat so sad!!! He was me fav!!! Did your bro give him mouth to mouth?" and "I loved him more than (The Hun) ever did".

It was totally WTF was I thinking going out with someone so immature, so fanboy, making it sound like my family didn't do enough and that the dogs death was all about him.

I can only wish you one of those golden moments!

somewhat-sober said...

omfg - creepiness, my dirtscumretarded ex-boyfriend messaged me last night too - and i hadn't had anything to do with him since december last year. there is something not fucking right with the world.

i hope you can push him to the back of your mind again. i was seriously livid, cos i haven't thought about that c*nt (much) for ages and all of a sudden i have to think about it again, and thre is always that problem of 'if i don't respond will he just keep hassling me' or 'if i do respond, will he keep on contacting' blah blah blah

good luck to you - boys suck, not in the good way.

Puss In Boots said...

Martie, Martie, Martie *shakes head.* And you were doing so well!

I agree, there's something weird happening. An ex of mine called me the other night out of the blue. Very bizarre. And I don't think he had a point to the conversation, either. But it didn't fuck me up. I have no feelings for him anymore, thank god!

You poor girl. Remember, these people can only hurt us if we let them. Tell him to fuck off, stick his name back in the freezer and be done with it.

The Mutant said...

I wish I could understand the whole head-fuck ex dillema, just think if I had all the right answers I could make a fortune!

I'm the last person to take advice about ex's from... this one time I got so "I miss the two-timing cunt-faced fat arsehole" that I actually rang him, just to hear him speak... I didn't say anything, just listened. Now thats fucked up right there.

So I could offer some sage advice, but I want you to still like me... Might just keep my big trap shut!

Fingers crossed it doesn't get too messy for ya.

Steph said...

Delete his number from your phone. That is the ONLY thing that works for me. I've had friends wrestle the phone out of my hands! ohh the cringe factor.

Why not do the reverse of the ice thing, cos that aint workin for ya.

so write his name on a bit of paper and BURN it. That or buy a vodoo doll. Stick a pin right in his goolies.

Anonymous said...

My boyfriend just broke up with this morning because I wouldn't let him watch porn and wank while I was getting ready for work. I am completely serious. FFS, am I wrong? Don't call me a selfish bitch cause I don't feel like hearing the moans on the TV while I'm trying to iron my clothes. Nice idea, Steph. I think I will delete his number, cause I am dying to call him. I am being so weak, but this is just not normal. (had to post anon cause I'm just too embarrassed).

Giggleworthy said...

Sever like a limb - delete numbers, email addy etc.

If they contact you, ignore or reply with 'you are no longer a part of my life - do not contact me again'

It works