Friday, February 17, 2006

If it's good enough for Flick Scully...

100th post for me! Let's hope it's as shit as all the others. Consistency peoples is thy name of the game.

A DILEMMA! Yesterday, I went to a shopping centre & bought a cheeseburger because I was in a hurry and I was hungry. Whilst acquiring a bottle of diet coke, however, I dropped said cheeseburger on the floor (it was wrapped). As I really had no time to stand in line again, I invoked the Holly Valance Three Second Rule (TM) and picked it up, unwrapped it, threw offending pickle away, and ate it.

Was this the correct thing to do? Do I now have diseases (well, more than I already 'have' anyway)? Should I have 'blown' the germs off it? Please help, oh lurking doyennes of social ettiquette.

It's just occurred to me that I did this in front of an entire food court of people. Should I be embarassed that I ate food from the floor in front of the general public? Does it matter that they were all bogan single mothers under the age of 22, with bad peroxide jobs, wearing tight black pants and parachute motorsport jackets?

Anyway, as this matter of great importance plays on one side of my mind, another matter has intruded into my thoughts; I have a blogger crush* (totally hetero though LOLZ!!!!1!).

What is the etiquette in this situation? Can I still have a crush and be quasi seeing Jungle Boy for the moment? Do I have to advise my crush that they are the object of my affection? If I were to grow a backbone (oh, the irony), and make a move, how would I do that? A carefully worded email? A hint-laden post?

I wonder what Holly Valance would do about this?



*Like fuck I am telling anyone who it is.

10 comments:

Desci said...

If it's the same person as my blogger crush, you'll have to deal with sharing. xo

Hint-laden post, methinks. It's how Mistress Matisse and Monk got together, and they're blogging royalty.

tokenwoman said...

The cheeseburger was wrapped- of course there is no issue. The bogan single mothers probably wouldn't have had an issue if it was unwrapped and you dropped it and ate it.

The other two are right- hint laden post is what you have to do. And blog crushes don’t count in real life anyway…

Steph said...

Nothing wrong with a bit of textual intercourse.

You do realise that every person who reads your blog will now think you're reffering to them? ha!

Ben said...

Someone was telling me just the other day that some scientist in America actually did his thesis on the three second rule.

And apparantly it holds up - you're safe!

Those bogans must be smarter than they look then, no?

Hambo said...

Want to know why there are killer germs going around that can kill you in less than a day? Its because people have "weak" immune systems from lack of exposure to germs (plus the over use of antibiotics). Unless you have a really bad immune system, you would be fine, if not making your immune system stronger.

See all the kids today that have allergies and asthma? Its because they have had less exposure to germs when they were babies.

Well I end my rant now, with these words. It was wrapped.

Oh and a hit-laden post would be really great, it would ease the minds of many. At the moment, I think that I am the one your talking about, and thats giving me a big head... get your minds out of the gutter people.

Hint us up.

Enny said...

Same as above re: wrapped and hints.

Greg said...

Congrats on 100 th post

If the cheeseburger had not have been wrapped then it wouldn't have been ok, almost as bad infact if you had eaten the pickle.

As for the blog crush, it depends on how far you want to take it, a subtle hint or two either on your blog or on comments left on their blog could do wonders ...

Hambo said...

I say take it all the way! All the way to the bedroom!!1! LolS

Martie said...

Desci - I think we're destined to share everything. In Jelly. xx

D - The private & public thing is exciting! So I'm leaning towards a post!

TW - I really really hope they don't count IRL - so I can just pass it off as a phase if I'm not successful!

Alice - You're right, they would have eaten it if it wasn't wrapped. I saw one getting a paper out of a bin today. *ugh*

Ruby - Darl, you know I just can't EMAIL YOU AND TELL YOU!! It's a secret. I feel very nervous about the whole thing! Email me instead!

Steph - Haha. That was the idea!

Ben - No, it seems Holly Valance must be smarter than she looks?!

Hambo - Do you want to give me a smack now too for eating the damn thing?? Keep yourself and your big head tuned for hints, mkay?

Enny - Here is a hint for you: CHECK YOUR MAIL IN THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS!!! xx

Greg - Eww. I made sure I stood there and disposed of the pickle before I ate it. They must have thought I was even weirder.

Enny said...

Still Checking!!! Still Empty!!!