Recipe - Le self pity
1. Cold & Rainy Afternoon/Night - Check
2. New Sheets on bed - Check
3. Freshly laundered pyjama pants stolen from the cunt that STOOD ME UP FOR THE BILLIONTH TIME - Check
4. Depressing Cold Play Music (Track 4) - Check
5. Feel-good take-away for dinner - Check
6. 'Off' button on mobile so I can't keep checking for the elusive little envelope
sign for the messages that the cunt won't send me - Check
7. 
In Mint Chip flavour, of course - Check
8. Baileys. And Ice. - Check
9. 
The Queen of them all, on DVD. - Check
Mix together listlessly. Avoid throwing squishy purple cushion against wall. Watch DVD, and resolve to become more liket the Grand Old Dame herself - chew 'em up and spit 'em out, etc.
Finally, follow with a spattering of vomit and a bit of No Doubt's 'Sunday Morning', and pass out.
Voila! Your Saturday night in the bag.
6 comments:
hahahaha, me too. But my chocolate is hazlenut, and I'll be watching pirates of the carribian tonight.
I actually DID stay in on Fri night JUST to wash my hair!
Sweet Jesus, Martie! This is not an acceptable form of behaviour, at least if that was me something would at least get broken in the process. Of course I wish I had your fortitude and could actually switch my mobile off - that could very well save me a whole world of pain!
And what is it about clean sheets and pyjamas thats so fucking awesome?
Anyway, if there is one thing I've learnt, its that all men are cunts. Bitter much? Nah, just a realist!
I had a similar Saturday night, though I watched a French film instead. And I had Damien Rice on instead of Coldplay. Men suck.
Are you still watching movies and eating chocolate?
It's been like a week now...!
really good shit babe
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