Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Oh. No.

Oh dear bloggers, we (as in I) seem to have a leetle, tiny, problem. Someone is going to have to slap me silly. But first, a psychologist update...

So. After therapy tonight, it has come to light that I have a problem with 'Saturday nights'. As in, I don't have anything to do on Saturday nights, and this is affecting my depression levels. Well, I do actually; I get takeaway and settle in to watch Judge John Deed either at my place, or at the parents', but somehow it doesn't quite stack up with the pubbing and clubbing, and sleeping with people that have torn sheets that I seem to be confronted with every Monday. Now I know, and you know, that there's nothing wrong with taking it easy on the weekend, "I work hard, and like to relax on the weekend" (Copyright, RSVP), but in the stupid little regimented part of my brain, 'relaxing' every Saturday night with a Queso Fundido, and the trials and tribulations of the English Law System is lame and thus, makes me lame by default.

So, my homework for the next fortnight is as such:

1 - Accept watching Judge John Deed as a treat for working hard during the week; keeping telling self that Saturday night is not the be-all and end-all of nights.


Is this the be-all and end-all of British Law?

2 - Make a move to 'mix-up' my Saturday nights by myself and do something that I enjoy in public, like nudity. Well, not quite, maybe start off with something smaller like; go to Readings or Borders and read a book whilst partaking in a coffee on a Saturday night; Walk down a nice strip of shops (IE - Chapel Street, Burke Road, Brunswick Street); Go for walk along beach; etc. Brainstorming/Suggestions are very welcome. I only have two weeks!

3 - Enquire about 'groups' that I can join - that meet Saturday night. This is going to be hard.

So while I have a think about my homework, let's turn our attention to more pressing matters; MY PROBLEM.

It can be summarised as follows:









In somewhat disturbing news, I have a MAJOR CRUSHES on an ex-boy band member and the fat cunt from Australian Idol.

Oh. Fucking. No.

Who said I didn't have anything to write about.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi. Long time listener, first time caller..

Anyway, just thought I'd add that it's great you're still with us. I've been hanging out to read of your adventures lately, and kudos to you for sticking with it. You may not realise it, but there is a whole community out here that is supporting you 110%, and are just dying to see what you're up to.

So.. on to the topic at hand. You are strong enough to have made it thus far, and you know you have more strength in you. Going out, while fun and, if facts be known, puerile, you have sooooo much more in you. The fun is in you.. don't look for it anywhere else than inside of you. Here endeth the rant of the Dalai Lama.

Do yourself a favour darl.. grab a mate, head to your local bar, (and I live in Melbourne, so I know there are hundreds out there to choose from) and just drink a few tequila sunrises, get some numbers (no going home with anyone just yet, you seriously need the numbers first), and just have a few laughs. Not all men are pricks. Okay, most are, but not all.

Get the numbers, wake up the next morning, remember back to the previous night, see who made you happy/laugh the most/horny, wait 4-7 days, then call them.

Getting out is the greatest cure for the blues. Trust me. (Insert lame joke about someone who says trust them.)

You deserve better than you've got so far, and if you get out and see the world, with panties firmly secured, you know it can be a bunch of fun.

That being said.. please please please.. just take care of yourself. Like I said in the beginning, you have a fan-base out here that have been amused by your writing for quite some time, and we'd like to think that you'd be around to continue that tradition/saga for some time to come. Depression hits us all in some form or another. Take stock of your life as you can, then get back into life. It's a great ball-game. Look forward to your future posts.

Take care of you, then of the world around you.

James.

Dot said...

Mars is free Saturdays... youse guys should go to the Edgy or sumthing.

Enny said...

I can't say anything to top the first one.

I think your pencilled in Saturday night plans sound great - if I was in town I'd def be in for coming along - my Saturday nights aren't any more exciting.

Mars said...

seriously... it seems we should be friends (at least for the next 2 months until i PO over seas)... we live right near each other, and both seem to have no life.

we could at least watch bad tv together.

i recently met someone else off the internet, so now come with references in that i am a fully-fledged non-stalker.

word up!

ps - fuck off dot, you smug mole

The Mutant said...

Saturday nights blow the cock as far as I'm concerned (and not in a good way). As for your crushes... let's just say I wouldn't mind being crushed by either of those boys. Scary huh, but I think we've shared a passion for similar men in the past.

So... hot chocolate/ice cream/facial hair equipped men some time soon?

Enny said...

I think you totally need to do a blog meetup by the sounds of it! :o)

Moi said...

Thank you. No, thank you. I found myself at home on Saturday night and remembered reading your blog about Judge John Deed, so thought I would check it out. I am now hooked! So, thanks, I'll be planning my Saturday nights around this show too from now on.... ;)

Enny said...

We'll have none of that disappearing nonsense thankyou very much - come back and update THIS MINUTE!!