Secret life of randoms...

Lying in bed last night, I was just drifting off to sleep when I heard my mobile buzzing. Being a complete text message whore, I forced my arm out of the nice warm covers and grabbed my phone and pressed read:

"luv to c u"

Who was this late night paramour? I didn't recognise the number, so I text back:

"That's good, but who is this?"

At this point, all sorts of scenarios began running through my head: It was the ex-fucker playing a stupid prank on me; it was someone who genuinely had the wrong number; it was some kids playing a prank to a random number or it was a murderer who had managed to get hold of my mobile number and was standing outside my door and his reply would be "The person who's going to kill you" then would come bursting in with a machete and hack me to pieces.

Overactive imagination, I know.

Anyway, my mobile buzzed again and I jumped 10 feet in the air:

"Remba u sad ur sux"

No self respecting murderer is going to murder the English language like that, no matter how bloodthirsty they are, so I relaxed a little. But fuck me, it was obviously some WTFOMG teen being a smart ass, so I decided to have a little fun:

"WTF? Are you illiterate?" (All the while laughing at the irony of using WTF in a sentence where you pose the question - are you illiterate?!!)

No reply. Damn. The illiteracy thing was a bit heavy for them.

But it got me thinking: I couldn't really get mad at them, because I used to do exactly the same thing when I was young and dumb. I remember back in the good old days when mobiles weren't around and we would dial random numbers in the hope of getting an answering machine, then we would leave a message along the lines of:

"thanks a lot for last night it was really great we should do it again soon" or similar.

Inevitably, a whole lot of 14 year girls would giggle at the end, so hopefully the recipient or the recipient's partner would realise it was a (stupid) joke. Hopefully. Now I'm stressing, hoping we didn't break up any relationships or anything. Please, I beg for your forgiveness if you are reading this. We only said that you had a nice looking dick because saying 'dick' was funny. C'mon, we were 14. It's not like any, err, most of us had ever seen a dick before...

Of course when I discovered text messages, I started up a complete text msg relationship by accident with a complete random. But now that I've 'grown up' and I actually VALUE money, I'm a little less hasty with the buttons, if ya know what I mean.

Do you reckon that it's sad that I sometime dream about accidently texting someone, and finding out they are your soul mate, then marrying them, then....

Fuck. This is all too chick flick for me....