Lovely Lady Lumps - 2005's 'small and humble' mammories.
Oh, she's back. Fresh from showering us with her body juice, she's now back singing about humps and lumps and exactly what she can get a guy to spend on her because they are so 'lovely'.
Oh boy. Is this song for real? Not only is it annoyingly repetitive ("My hump, my hump my hump my hump. My hump my hump my hump, my lovely lady lumps"), but why should we have to endure a song all about Fergie's tits and arse? Which I'm sorry, aren't even that good anyway - I wouldn't do her in a (literal) pink fit.
I'm no prude, but this is not the kind of thing I want to be hearing on my radio. Obviously, since the BEP are such a sell-out now, they are catering expressly for the 13 year old market, who can now skank around telling all and sundry about their lumps and humps at the shopping centres.
It concerns me that Jungle Boy actually downloaded their new album, and has a thing about her. If you get a chance, check out this week's issue of No Idea - and the pic of her. She's a MAN! And she sweats like a man too! I apologise friends, but I couldn't find that pic anywhere.
I did however, find some pics that supported my MAN theory:
Man.
Oh yes, lovely 'lady' lumps there. Sure you can't get them any further up your chin??
Here she is, accepting the award for best male Carmen Electra impersonator.
Pick which is the father of Britney's baby
So tell me, does this song annoy you as much as it annoys me? Does it make you wanna smash your car radio in frustration, hurting your hand and causing a 10 car pile up change the radio in your car whenever it comes on? Or maybe you like it, and want to get sprayed with Stacey-juice up the front of the stage at the BEP concerts? I don't know, you tell me - or any other song that drives you insane?
11 comments:
Holy. Shit. Martie.
I just heard that song for the first time tonight - fucking woeful.
Woeful I say, woeful.
It's officially made The Whisper Song by The Ying Yang Twins look like a work of art.
What peas (lols) me off more is that Im not the first to comment about this shit song.
I heard it about 2 months ago on the interweb winamp station "Hitz Radio". You can find it on winamp's media list's radio section.
When I first heard it, I thought to myself. This is really playschool. They find a kiddy word, repeat it a hundred times, and make it sound "raunchy" for their "older" fans.
My lump, my lump, my lump, I love it when you touch my man lump with your lady lump.
Give that song to the wiggles and you'll see what Im getting at.
I belive BEP went down the drain after Fergie joined. Shut up started the crap that BEP have been spewing on our ears.
Shut up. Just shut up shut up.
Repeating of the words "Shut up". Plus it was all like "Hey this band is telling us to be quiet, omg they are edgy"
Then it was "Hey Mama". Starred in it own iPod ad, and is equally annoying. With almost babyish speak like "jamma". The Fuck?
BEP had a change of heart with "Lets get retarded" but for some retarded reason, released "Lets get it started". Why, either to keep the anti-alcohol lobby or the "don't call tards retards" lobby happy. Fuck them. Turns out that that move boosted album sales. Cunts.
Then we enter the modern era of fucked up BEP songs.
No No No, don't phunk with my heart. What the phunk? I mean fuck. They are like a fucking rap group. cleaning up their lyrics only say they are only trying to sell their songs to kiddies. They groups trying to censor this band should just try to get the band band. fuck, i mean phunk.
then we get more repetitive lyrics with the song "Don't Lie" featuring more of Fergies Patented "Noh's". Phunking Jesus Christ!!! Kill her already!
Now we have phunking "My Humps". Phunk me! If you could apply shark jumping to bands, BEP jumped the shark when they got Fergie to join up. They jumped the shark again when they got into that iPod ad, and also into the game "The Urbz: Sims in the City". BEP have sold out. I expect their next song to be worse than shit itself.
Hoobastank's 'The Reason'. The receptionist insists upon listening to mix fm, and this song is played daily. Oh, and friggin Missy Higgins... I think they just pop her album in and hit 'shuffle'.
The less polite in our office put in earphones to drown the radio out... the rest of us just suffer through.
Look at the blown-up pic of them at the counter of jb hi fi on bourke street for the last proof you need that SHE IS A DUUUDE.
Missy phunking Higgins, phunk is there anyone more annoying? Well there is, but she is like makes you want to get a blade of some sort and tear peices of your flesh off bit by bit, while putting salt and lemon juice in the open wounds.
Well said Hambo.
All I add to this conversation is suggesting that Pissy Higgins should rename her album to The Sound of Shite, as it's a more accurate representation of her musical talent (sic).
Hambo, my love has only grown for you after your comment.
And I don't know what it is about Missy Higgins - unfortunately that song 'The Special Two' is burned into me forever and I cannot join in the hate!
OHHHH god. I apologise in advance but i'm a proud flag waving bimbo! I know their songs are lame, but they get stuck in my head and i end up dancing around to it. Oh and Missy.....i love her too. I have been told by all and sundry that my taste in music if fucking woeful so you won't offend me when you flame my ass off right....about....now *runs for cover*.
your dead to me now steph, dead.
Give me TISM, Beck, Custard, The Gurge, Spiderbait, The Eels, The Gorillaz, etc, etc, etc anyday.
Ok out of all that i only recognise the Gorillas and Spiderbait!!
*runs away again*
Yes well friends, I've taken a swipe at the current state of the charts before, and since that occasion it has actually got WORSE.
Look at the chart this week. There are TWO crazy frog and TWO Akon "songs" in there, plus the Schnappi song.
OMFG who compiles these things? Oh wait. I already know the answer to that.
To deal with the specifics of the original post, and comment I heard the "lumps" song the other day on Nova and broke up laughing. Id actually read this post before hearing the song so of course the memory of the post came flooding back.
But yes its complete tripe, its tripe, tripe tripe tripe...
Missy Higgins: Hmpf. I'd rather get my teeth drilled without any pain relief than listen to her by choice.
Someone at a party once as a joke I'm sure said "Hey you can sing" and the joke was never really explained to her.
And here we are today. Someone please let her know....
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